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Barn Jokes

Used to never be able to use the wifi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn. Now I have a stable connection.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Barn Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       When is a tractor not a tractor? When it turns into a barn.   Used to never be able to use the wifi at my farm until I moved… Continue reading Barn Jokes

Line Jokes

I like jokes about stationery but rulers are where I draw the line.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Line Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Had a race to see who could hang out our towels on the washing line quickest. It was level pegging.   Took a risk washing my clothes when there… Continue reading Line Jokes

Recipe Jokes

Most recipes in French language cook books only require a single egg. One egg is an oeuf.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Recipe Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       A friend of mine cooks my making up a recipe and adding a German white wine. It’s an add hock approach to cooking.   The recipe said “chill in… Continue reading Recipe Jokes

Dark Jokes

Friend of mine got a job as a road cleaner who only works after dark. I don't know how he sweeps at night.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Engineer Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       I saw a horse in a wild west show that glowed in the dark once. Think he was rodeo active.   The electricity company cut my friend off without… Continue reading Dark Jokes

Fishing Jokes

For Sale: Replica Fisherman's Knife (Made To Scale).

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Engineer Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       It’s the Fishing tournament today. I hear it’s all online. Anyone got a good stream?   Went to see a play about fly fishing. The cast was amazing.  … Continue reading Fishing Jokes

Helium Jokes

I love helium. I just can't speak highly enough about it.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Engineer Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Some helium went into a bar. The barman shouted “Oi! I’ve told you! We don’t serve Noble gases in here! Get out!” The helium didn’t react.   Heard a… Continue reading Helium Jokes

Engineer Jokes

A friend passed his degree in sound engineering. He got a 1-2-1-2.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Engineer Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       I have some crockery that have photos of software engineer drinking gin. They’re tech-tonic plates.   Managed to get some engineering calculations wrong by using the wrong pencil. It… Continue reading Engineer Jokes

Newspaper Jokes

Saw an advert in my local newspaper saying "Account Wanted: £50000 - £60000. I phoned them and said "It's -£10000".

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Newspaper Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Dracula always read the best selling local newspaper because he heard that it had a good circulation.   Got upset when I couldn’t find any scissors to cut a… Continue reading Newspaper Jokes

Garage Jokes

A friend has gone into business by setting up a garage that fixes car ignitions. It’s a start up.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Oyster Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Popped into the local garage, and the mechanic was having a tea. Think he was on a brake.   My car sailed through its MOT inspection. The garage is… Continue reading Garage Jokes

Oyster Jokes

Surprised they wouldn't accept my Oyster card in the local Shell station...

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Oyster Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Oysters never donate to charity. They’re shellfish.   What’s made of chocolate, has a shell and lives at the bottom of the sea? An oyster egg.   A friend… Continue reading Oyster Jokes

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