Month: June 2023

Rug Jokes

Tried to speed up my magic carpet for the big race but was told I couldn't use performance enhancing rugs.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Rug Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I got 20% off at the local carpet shop. I’m going to have to buy a big rug now to cover that bit. What did the rug say to the floor? Don’t… Continue reading Rug Jokes

Button Jokes

I used to wonder where they stored spare belly buttons, then I realised it's in the Naval Reserve.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Button Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Pressed the Hammer Function button on my new drill, and it keeps playing “You can’t touch this”. Not to say I’m out of date, but I just spent half an hour trying… Continue reading Button Jokes

Flag Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Flag Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… There are a lot of good things about Switzerland.  The flag is a big plus. What has Santa got in common with a flag?  You often find them both at the pole.… Continue reading Flag Jokes

Gravity Jokes

Gravity is a fundamental force. If you remove it, you get gravy.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Gravity Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Read a book about the relatively low gravity on the surface of Mars. Couldn’t put it down. Got some anti-gravity drinks. They’re very uplifting. I always find gravity disappointing. It always brings… Continue reading Gravity Jokes

Cinema Jokes

Told the doctor that I kept thinking I worked at a cinema. He told me I was just projecting.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Cinema Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Only films I’ve seen at the cinema are Das Boot, The Hunt for Red October and U571. I only go for subtitles. Went to the cinema to see a film about playing… Continue reading Cinema Jokes