Santa Jokes

the illuminaughty

Merry Christmas! This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Santa Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Where does Father Christmas go to chill out, relax in a forest, and take a spa? Santa Parcs… Why does Santa spend January filling in his tax… Continue reading Santa Jokes

Christmas Decoration Jokes

Disappointed that even my Christmas tree lights go out more than I do at Christmas.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Christmas Decoration Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       What do Santa’s elves use in the kitchen instead of a knife or fork? A u-tinsel. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? Hornaments… I’m worried that… Continue reading Christmas Decoration Jokes

Star Jokes

Came third in a Star Naming competition. I got a constellation prize.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Star Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… What do you get if you cross Captain America with the Incredible Hulk? The Star Spangled Banner. Saw a 70s television programme about two detectives who solve crimes over the phone. Star… Continue reading Star Jokes

Microwave Jokes

Realised how long you put fish in the microwave to reheat it. Tuna half minutes.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Microwave Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I had an unbelievably hot curry last night. It was a Korma, but I microwaved it for twenty minutes. Friend of mine was sent to prison for six months for stealing microwaves.… Continue reading Microwave Jokes