This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Dress Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
I used to dress off the peg but now my neighbours bring their laundry in at night.
My local dress alteration company is really fast. Tailor swift.
Had to give up my job at the dress alteration company. Apparently I didn’t turn up enough.
Got a job taking photos of salmon and tuna in dresses and shirts. Sounds odd but was really easy, like shooting fish in apparel.
I once saw a smartly dressed chap on a unicycle and a scruffy one on a bike. The difference between them was attire.
What do programmers wear to parties? Whatever is in the dress code.
Went to a shop and said “I’d like to try on that dress in the shop window”. Person working there said I had to try it on in the changing room like everyone else.
I went out once wearing a dress with tennis balls on it and got served straight away.
For International Bread Week, I’m going to dress as a different type each day. Roll on Monday!
My partner put on a new dress and told me to zip it. No idea what I’d said that was wrong…
If you like these dress jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.