This week’s collection of puns and one-liners take the form of bed jokes, for no particular reason. As normal, no guarantee of funniness or originality…
Heard a myth about a single bed placed on top of another one, and attached with a ladder. Fortunately, I was able to debunk it.
Not going to lie, my bed is broken.
I would tell a joke about a bed, but it hasn’t been made up yet.
“I was in a play called breakfast in bed once”. “Did you have a big role?” “No, just toast with a bit of butter”.
Couldn’t sleep, so went to a counsellor for advice. He said, “sleep on the edge of the bed, you’ll soon drop off”
Saw a shop saying they were having a bed sale, 50% off everything. When I went in, all of their beds were only three foot long.
I wrote a story about my bed. I made it myself.
A friend replaced his bed with a trampoline without telling his partner. She hit the roof.
I thought about splashing out on a water bed.
Taller people sleep longer in bed.
Simba was always the last of the pride to get out of bed. He was the lie-in king.
I was in a band once called Teenager’s Bed. Never made it.
Last week’s Fortune Teller jokes are here.
If you like these bed jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.