Herb Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Herb Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…


Great to hear The Doctor’s new herb range has won awards. He is a Thyme Lord.


Thought I’d purchase a tall herb plant but actually turned out to be tiny. No big dill.


I used to work with a very wise herb gardener. He was well known for his sage advice.


Was going to send back my fish in a herb sauce at a restaurant the other night, but I wasn’t sure if it was the thyme or the plaice.


I know someone who was habitually late, until his doctor recommended sleeping in a herb garden. Sounds odd, I know, but now he wakes up on Thyme.


I saw a new book about cooking with herbs. It’s about Thyme.


A girl told me that she recognised me from the local vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.


I like to put coriander on my blended tomatoes. It’s soup herb.


Friend of mine has done really well selling herb based products. Minted.


I’ve got a device to fetch futuristic herbs. It’s a thyme machine.


I asked Sean Connery if he liked herbs. He said “yes, but only partially”.


Went to a restaurant the other night, asked for something herby. They gave me an old Volkswagen Beetle with no driver.


If you like these herb jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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