Handle Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Handle Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…


I hailed a taxi, pointed to the car in front and said to the driver “follow him!”. He said “Sure, what’s his Twitter handle?”

What’s the best way to hold a bat? By the handle.

Friend quit his job at the door factory. He just couldn’t get a handle on it.

What’s the best way to handle Welsh cheese? Caerphilly.

Need to get a handle on all the knock knock jokes.

Watched a documentary about door handles. It was gripping.

Friend of mine works as a baggage handler at the airport, but used to be a lawyer. He kept losing his cases.

There are two types of crime fiction fans in the world. Those who can handle suspense and…

Why don’t vampires work in butchers? They can’t handle the steaks.

Just apologised to my front door for letting it slam. I could have handled it better.

Been doing some DIY on the kitchen cupboards. Really helped me get a handle on them.


If you like these handle jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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