Bike Jokes

I’m writing this in early January, and there seem to be even more people than normal out on bikes at the moment. No doubt New Year resolutions for many include getting fit, and I’m sure there were plenty of new bicycles that arrived as Christmas presents a couple of weeks ago, so this week the one liners and puns take the form of bike jokes.  As normal, do not expect originality or for them to be overly funny….



I saw a toddler with a tiny Edam strapped to his bike. Must have been his baby bell.


I left by bike beside a wall the other day, and it fell over.  It was two tyred.


I crossed a bike with a flower and got some cycle petals.


I saw a chap painting pictures of bikes on a local church roof.  Cycleangelo.


A friend of mine works for a company that makes bikes.  He’s their spokesman.


There’s a vampire bike around here that keeps biting people. It’s a vicious cycle.


A bank manager friend has given up riding his bike.  He has lost his balance.


My dog used to chase everyone on a bike.  Then I took his bike away.


A friend of mine used to be obsessed with his bike, he was out on it ten times a day.  He’s fine now, just had to break the cycle.


I took my new bike back to the shop and said the pedals didn’t work.  Chap asked why I thought it was called a push bike.



Last week’s road jokes are here.

If you like these bike jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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