River Jokes

I had a pleasant view this week in a meeting looking over the Thames, so river jokes seemed as good a theme for this week’s puns and one liners as anything else. So, as normal, don’t expect too much hilarity or originality.




Who carries out operations in a river? A sturgeon.


Love watching rivers on the internet.  Was watching a live stream earlier.


I enjoy throwing coins in the river and watching them.  I like studying my cash flow.


Where do fish wash? In a river basin.


A chap jumped in the river in Paris. Local police say he’s in Seine.


A chap jumped in the river in Cairo. Local police say he’s in de Nile.


How do you get a pen across a river? Biro-ing.


Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.


How do you get two whales in a car?  Down the M4 then over the river Severn.


Why didn’t the hipster swim in the river?  It was too mainstream.


What do you call the small tributaries of the main river in Cairo?  Juveniles.


I like the scenery around river valleys.  Some are absolutely gorges.




Last week’s tower jokes are here.

If you like these river jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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