Monk Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners are all on the topic of Monk Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

Was out camping when a monk tried to sell me flowers but I said no. I like to do my bit to prevent florist friars.

A local Bhuddist monk went to see the dentist, but refused all the drugs he was offered. He wanted to transcend dental medication.

I saw a bunch of men in habits and cowls dancing enthusiastically. It was the Monastery of Sound.

Best way to get out of a habit is to become an undercover monk.

I always wanted to be a Gregorian monk but I never got the chants.

Local heavy metal singer has decided to give it all up and live as a monk in the Himalayas. He’s now a Bhuddist Priest.

Saw a guy in a monastery cutting up potatoes and cooking them. I asked if he was the friar, apparently he was the chip monk.

A monk went to a pizza restaurant and asked “me make one with everything”.

Turned down a job in the laundry at a monastery as I didn’t want to pick up any dirty habits.

Why don’t monks vacuum in the corners of monasteries? They have no attachments.

If you like these monk jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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