Addiction Jokes

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

It has been pointed out that, given the number of motor racing events that I have been to recently, perhaps I am at least a little bit addicted to the sport. So, it seemed that addiction jokes were as good a topic as any for this week’s puns and one liners. As normal, they come with no guarantee of wit or originality, and they may not leave you crying out for more.




What do cold turkey addicts do to cure themselves?


Local chap had an addiction to eating raw meat, but now he’s cured.


A friend was explaining his Twitter addiction to me. I didn’t follow him.


Started reading a book about addiction. Can’t put it down.


Vegetable patch: helping carrot addicts recover.


A friend of mine is addicted to drinking brake fluid. He says he can stop at any time.


Another friend used to be addicted to drinking detergent, but he’s clean now.


Someone I know has an addiction to computers that is getting alt of ctrl.


I’m trying to overcome my addiction to exercise bikes, but I’m not getting far.


A friend used to plant so many trees that it was turning into an addiction, until he cut down.


Asked the doctor if it’s normal to spend all day listening to Tom Jones. He said, “it’s not unusual.”


Asked the doctor how to get over my addiction of listening to Run DMC songs. He said, “it’s tricky”.


I used to be addicted to listening to Michael Jackson songs. I beat it.




Last week’s summer jokes are here.

If you like these addiction jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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