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Luck Jokes

I often say to myself, "what good luck that the cloning maching works".

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Luck Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… My Lucky Dip was full of bits of clay. Turned out I’d entered the National Pottery. Worried I couldn’t restore lost files from my laptop, but luckily I had a back up… Continue reading Luck Jokes

Animal Vehicle Jokes

Mickey Mouse's helicopter is no use in Scotland. Disneyland.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Animal Vehicle Jokes, a request that’s come our way for a series of puns that involve animals and vehicles. Niche, we know. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Two fish in a tank. One says to the other, “how do… Continue reading Animal Vehicle Jokes

Wedding Jokes

Of course, they're not called tears at a wedding. It's eye dew.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Wedding Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I went to a wedding that was so emotional that even the cake was in tiers… Went to a low bandwidth wedding recently. Awful reception. My microwave & freezer got married in… Continue reading Wedding Jokes

Label Jokes

A friend of mine taught me to label graphs. Legend.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Label Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I opened a new box of animal crackers the other day. It said on the label “don’t eat if seal is broken”. I checked the shapes, and it was. Delighted to finish… Continue reading Label Jokes

Coal Jokes

Applied for a job extracting coal but they said I didn't have the right experience. Never mined.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Coal Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Watched a documentary about people walking on fiery hot coals. It was sole destroying. Group of guys covered in coal dust walk into a bar. The barman says “Sorry, we don’t serve… Continue reading Coal Jokes

Wardrobe Jokes

s one door closes, another one opens. Wish I'd paid more attention to the assembly instructions for this wardrobe.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Wardrobe Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Read a book about a fictional character laundering their clothes and putting them away. The Iron, The Witch and The Wardrobe Went into my bedroom the other day and saw that the… Continue reading Wardrobe Jokes

Screen Jokes

Went on an online video call and a picture of a can of spam appeared on my screen. Think it was a zoom meat tin.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Screen Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… Took me a while to get used to email, I used to stick stamps to the screen. I’ve just changed my screen size to 1366 x 766. It’s my New Year resolution.… Continue reading Screen Jokes

Sparkling Jokes

Asked a soldier why he was running away with a bottle of sparkling wine, apparently he was told to take cava.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Sparkling Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I lay back, looked at the sparkling stars, and thought “someone has stolen my tent”. Forgot to put the lid back on my sparkling bottle last night. Checked this morning, though, and… Continue reading Sparkling Jokes

Sleigh Jokes

You can get a sleigh online for £200, or £100 if you are willing toboggan.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Sleigh Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… What do young reindeer want for Christmas? A pony sleigh station. What is the difference between St George and Santa’s reindeer? One slays a dragon, the others are dragging a sleigh. How… Continue reading Sleigh Jokes

Cardboard Jokes

"Big fish, little fish, cardboard box". Me checking the stock when I worked in a fish shop.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Cardboard Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I’d make a belt out of cardboard but it would be a waist of paper. I live in a lighthouse. It’s made of cardboard. “Big fish, little fish, cardboard box”. Me checking… Continue reading Cardboard Jokes

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