make a packet

Crisp Jokes

As normal, the topic for this week’s one liners is from random conversations, and so here are some crisp jokes. Don’t expect too much originality or hilarity.




I went into a shop and ask for some helicopter crisps. They didn’t have any, so I had some plain ones instead.


Saw a chess player snacking on crisps whilst drinking from an exotic looking glass. Pawn Cocktail.


I was out driving the other day and I spotted two packets of cheese & onion crisps walking down the road. I said, “Do you want a lift”. “No thanks”, they replied, “We’re Walkers”.


Went to the circus and saw some clowns with tightrope walkers. Oddest flavour of crisps yet.


Created a totally new flavour of crisp. If it’s successful, I’ll make a packet.


What is a frog’s favourite flavour of crisp? Croaky bacon.


What do you call a man with a crisp bag on his head? Russell.


Had some pelican crisps the other day. Tasted ok but the bill was enormous.


I used to love eating chips until I got barred from the casino.


A packet of crisps walks into a pub. The barman says “sorry, we don’t serve food here”.




Last week’s  biscuit jokes are here.


If you like these crisp jokes, have a look over here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.


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