blow my own crumpet

Breakfast Jokes

Welcome to the first blog post of 2018, and as it’s good to start with a hearty breakfast, here are some breakfast jokes.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…



Why do people normally only have a single egg for breakfast in France?  Because one egg is an oeuf.


Bought a new HP printer recently. The ink is a bit funny but tastes great on a bacon sandwich.


Some friends are discussing the best way to make a toasted sandwich for breakfast. I’m playing Breville’s Adovcate.


Had a mean breakfast the other day. Tasted average.


I’d tell you the joke about some jam on a piece of bread for breakfast but you might spread it.


“I was in a play called breakfast in bed once”. “Did you have a big role?” “No, just toast with a bit of jam”.


A bacon sandwich walks into a pub. The barman says “sorry, we don’t serve food here”.


What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Ice Crispies


The best time to have eggs for breakfast is Easter.


I’ve made a really hot breakfast, but I’m not one to blow my own crumpet.



Last week’s balloon jokes are here

If you like these Breakfast Jokes, there is an index of joke topics here.


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