Secret Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Secret Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

 
 
 

How do you spot a secret agent? Give him measles.

 

Why do scarecrows find it hard to share secrets? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has
ears.

 

I have a feeling that my friend is a secret fan of the band Boston. In fact, it’s more than a feeling…

 

My secret is that I’m addicted to seaweed. I’m seeking kelp.

 

There are two types of people in the world. Those that can keep secrets, and I can’t tell you about the others.

 

I’ve discovered the secret of a long life. Be born as a giant tortoise.

 

Finally been accepted to the Secret Club. I can’t tell you how excited I am.

 

There are two secrets to success in life:
1. Don’t tell them everything you know.

 

What was the Soviet Union’s most secretive insect? The Cagey Bee.

 

John Lennon had a secret art collection, painted entirely in mauve, lilac, violet and lavender. Imagine all the purple…

 

Saw an ancient secret Viking message earlier. It was sent by Norse Code.

 
 
 

If you like these secret jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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