Rugby Jokes

A friend of mine is a scrum half but be will never make it as a senior member of the legal profession. He’s far too quick to judge.
A friend of mine is a scrum half but be will never make it as a senior member of the legal profession. He’s far too quick to judge.

We’ve had pages on various sports and hobbies before, so here are some rugby jokes, that may be just a bit trying… As normal they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality, but hopefully you will soon be a conversion to this type of humour…. And of course, when you’ve seen one rugby joke, you’ve seem a maul…

 

 

 

If you have a referee in rugby, what do you have in bowls? Soup.

 

The Pencil Rugby Club played the Pen Rugby Club at rugby recently. It ended up as a draw.

 

I’m trying to learn how to play rugby but can’t quite get there. Every time I think I’ve scored, the coach says “good try”.

 

A bloke I know told me he used to play rugby for Wasps. I always thought he was in the Bee team.

 

Enya has just bought a rugby team. Oddly enough, the next three fixtures are Sale (A) Sale (A) Sale (A).

 

These new rugby matches in space will never take off. There’s just no atmosphere.

 

A rugby player goes to the physio and says “it hurts when I touch my arm, my chest or my leg”. The physio says “you’ve broken your finger”.

 

What insect lives in your mats and is good at scoring tries? The Rug Bee.

 

I tried to play vehicle rugby but my car had only one boot.

 

I tried to play cycle rugby but I was two tyred.

 

Why did the rugby player go to see a vet? His calves were sore.

 

I went to the local rugby stadium and it was really cool inside. I think it was all the fans.

 

A friend of mine only goes to watch rugby to play pranks on people. He likes Twickenham.

 

A priest I know has taken up rugby. He’s scored a few tries but hasn’t made any conversions yet.

 

Local team of ghosts have taken up rugby. They are excellent at scoring drop ghouls.

 

Went to a rugby referee’s retirement recently. It was a good send off.

 

A friend of mine is a scrum half but be will never make it as a senior member of the legal profession. He’s far too quick to judge.

 

 

Last week’s nut jokes are here.

If you like these rugby jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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And you might just like this page all about sports themes…