I wrote earlier in the week about attending the Mobile World Congress this week in Barcelona, where the new Samsung Galaxy S6 was launched, so what better a topic for this week’s one liners and puns than phone jokes. Don’t be too shocked though, like with most ring tones, at a lack of originality or humour.
I phoned OK magazine the other day. They answered and said “Hello?”, so I said “Sorry, wrong number” and hung up.
Friend of mine used to take his iron to his job at the telephone exchange. He was a smooth operator.
Left my phone under my pillow last night and when I woke up it was gone and there was a pound coin there. I think it was the Bluetooth fairy.
Why didn’t the skeleton have a mobile? He had no body to talk to.
I got an SMS telling me that Vettel would win this year’s Formula One championship. Predictive texts drive me mad.
Fell asleep on my smartphone the other day. I had downloaded a nap.
What network is Luke Skywalker on? Yodafone.
What’s the most popular network in Yorkshire? T’Mobile.
Why does Mr Potato Head have a mobile? In case Mr Onion Rings.
Asked my iPhone, “surely I don’t need an umbrella today?”. Siri replied “yes, and don’t call me Shirley”. Turned out I had left Airplane mode on.
Put my phone into Airplane mode. What a rubbish transformer.
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It’s chordless.
A friend of mine has a mobile phone shaped like an Italian dumpling. It’s a gnocchia.
I can’t picture myself without a camera phone.
Last week’s castle jokes are here.
If you like these phone jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.