Lost by a neck

Giraffe Jokes

I asked my wife what the subject should be for this week’s one-liners, and she suggested giraffes.  I have no idea why.  So, here is a collection of giraffe jokes, and some are contributed by Mrs H.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of funniness or originality…




A teacher asks the class to name ten animals that you might find in Africa.  One of the pupils replies, “nine elephants and a giraffe”.


I gambled on a giraffe race the other day.  Mine came second.  Lost by a neck.  It was nowhere near.


Local giraffe graduated early from university.  He was head and shoulders above his class.


Had an argument with a giraffe once, and waited week for him to apologise. Takes them ages to swallow their pride.


Local zoo only has giraffes.  Giraffic Park.


A friend of mine says that he’s eating an odd animal in an exotic game restaurant.  I think he’s having a giraffe.


I’ve just bought a giraffe online.  Not sure if it will be delivered though, I suspect it’s a tall order.


…and my wife’s favourite giraffe joke that had her doubled in two with laughter…  What’s green and hangs from trees?  Giraffe snot.




Last week’s library jokes are here.

If you like these giraffe jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook.





Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *