Door Jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Door Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

 
 
 

Got out of the shower, went downstairs and opened the door in my towel. I know it’s a funny place to have a door.

 

How do you know when there’s a drummer at the door? He doesn’t know when to come in.

 

I saw a sign on shop door that said ‘Guide Dogs Welcome’. I walked in and was greeted by a Labrador who thanked me for shopping and took my jacket.

 

I’m writing a song about getting my door lock replaced. There’s a key change at the end.

 

A friend of mine is a guitar player, but you have to leave the door open for him. He can never find the right key to come in.

 

A friend had bred a messenger pigeon with a woodpecker. Not only does it deliver a message, it knocks the door when it gets there.

 

After years of wondering what happens behind closed doors, I finally know the answer. The post just lands on the carpet.

 

The worst thing about living next door to a good gardener is that the grass is always greener on the other side.

 

I went to a record shop and asked, “have you got anything by the Doors?” He said, “Yes, a bucket of sand, a mop and a brush”.

 

A clown held a door open for me the other day. I thought, “what a nice jester”.

 

When asked why he had painted his front door yellow, Sherlock Holmes replied “Lemon Entry, my dear Watson”.

 

I used to work at a revolving door company. Then I thought, “this job is going nowhere fast”.

 

A couple of friends have opened their doors recently a been slapped by a large, obnoxious spider. There’s a nasty bug going around.

 

My dog keeps barking every time there is someone at the door. Don’t know why, it’s almost never for her.

 

I called my dog Blacksmith. Every time I opened the door, he made a bolt for it.

 

A friend of mine is a musician. He used to be in a band called The Hinges, used to be quite big. They supported The Doors.

 

I woke up this morning with a tap on the door. The plumber thinks he’s funny.

 
 
 

If you like these door jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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