This week’s puns and one liners are all on the topic of Charge Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
Heard about someone who charges exorbitant amounts for ice cream. He’s a cone shark.
Police arrested a man who was carrying an electrical cable with him. He was released without charge.
One cable says to another, “I’m so happy that I’ve finally got rid of that charge I was carrying. I’m ex-static”.
I always find that charging batteries is revolting.
When my doctor told me I was to go on a journey to deliver charged atoms, I had a lot of quest ions.
I wanted to do something really scary for Halloween, so I dressed up as a phone with 1% charge.
Really nice car park here. The sign says “You will be charged after 2 hours”. Very kind, I thought, as I connected the cable to my electric car.
A neutron gets a pint and asks how much it is, and the barman says “For you, no charge”.
My local taxi company’s motto is “we go the extra mile”, which I understood when I saw how much they charged.
I went to a pub called ‘The Light Brigade’ recently. They certainly knew how to charge.
One of my neighbours was stealing things from the local supermarket whilst sitting on the shoulders of two vampires. He was charged with shoplifting on two counts.
Why do robots have summer holidays? To recharge their batteries.
How do you stop a bull from charging? Take away his credit card.
Saw a bull caught in an electric fence. Think it was charging.
A battery and a firework were arrested. One was charged, the other let off.
The jumper I got for Christmas kept picking up static electricity so I’m going to take it back to the shop and get it exchanged it for another one free of charge…
I hear that the cavalry have given up their experiment with battery powered mechanical horses. Apparently they don’t charge quickly enough.
Do quantum car mechanics have a minimum charge?
I gave away a lot of old batteries the other day, free of charge.
If you like these charge jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.