Category: 2014

Scarecrow Jokes

I saw a chap fighting with a scarecrow once. I thought, "he's just clutching at straws".

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Scarecrow Jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of funniness or originality…  although appropriately enough, these are more corny than normal.       A scarecrow friend of mine tried out as a stand up comedian, but he was too corny.   Another scarecrow… Continue reading Scarecrow Jokes

Flying Jokes

When I wear contact lenses, I keep seeing Russian aircraft flying around in front of my eyes. The doctor said it could be some kind of optical Ilyushins.

I was out this week with a couple of friends, and they suggested that a page of one-liners about holidays may be topical. However, as we have had holiday jokes already, I thought flying jokes would be a relatively close topic. As ever, they come with no guarantee of funniness or originality…     A… Continue reading Flying Jokes

Commonwealth Games Jokes

It’s the Commonwealth Fishing event today. I hear it’s all online. Anyone got a good stream?

The UK finds itself in he wonderful position of hosting he world’s third biggest summer games at the moment, after hosting the second biggest – The WPFG – in Belfast in 2013, and of course, the biggest – The London Olympics – in 2012. So, in their honour, here are some Commonwealth Games jokes. Unlike… Continue reading Commonwealth Games Jokes

Tree Jokes

A local bank is opening an ATM in a tree. If its successful, they might expand to other branches.

It’s Friday, so time for some one liners. Today, it’s the turn of tree jokes. I’m tempted to branch out to some puns,but maybe I should leaf it as it is…. As normal, these come with no guarantee of funniness or originality.     How does a tree get on the Internet? It logs in.… Continue reading Tree Jokes

Football Jokes

Great start to the season for Lion King FC: a win away, a win away, a win away...

This weekend sees the World Cup final, so it seems a good opportunity to have a few football jokes. Most seem to be about a specific team or player, but I thought I would stay neutral and just go for the silly… As normal, they come with no guarantee of funniness or originality… If you’re… Continue reading Football Jokes

Tennis Jokes

Not surprised by the high divorce rate among tennis players. Love means nothing to them.

I may be at Silverstone for the British Grand Prix this weekend – how exciting! – but there is another sporting event on in the UK which is likely to get just a little bit of attention, so with Wimbledon reaching its climax, this week’s collection of one-liners and puns is in the form of… Continue reading Tennis Jokes

Music Festival Jokes

Earth wind and fire

It’s the weekend of Glastonbury, and a couple of weeks ago I found myself at the Download festival at Donington Park, so it seems as good a time as any to have a page of one-liners and puns on the topic of music festival jokes.  As normal, don’t expect these to be either original or… Continue reading Music Festival Jokes

Scrabble Jokes

Suspect there will never be an edible version of Scrabble, but if there is, I'll eat my words.

This week’s collection of puns and one-liners is, for no particular reason, made up of Scrabble jokes. This could spell disaster…  As normal, they come with no guarantee of either funniness or originality… Old McDonald had a rubbish hand at scrabble. E-I-E-I-O. Scrabble is all fun and games until someone loses an i. Friend of… Continue reading Scrabble Jokes

Chair Jokes

I was working in a call centre when an irate caller asked to speak to someone higher up. So I stood on a chair.

The topic for this week’s collection of puns and one-liners is chair jokes. Here are a series of particularly short jokes on the topic.  As normal, they come with no guarantees of funniness or originality…     A friend of mine failed his chair exam. He’s going to resit.   How do you make a… Continue reading Chair Jokes

Sat Nav Jokes

Got stuck in traffic for so long the other day that even the sat nav said "Are we nearly there yet?"

My wife got a new sat nav yesterday, so in honour of that, here are some sat nav jokes. As normal, this collection of one-liners and puns comes with no guarantee of either funniness or originality….     I love my sat nav. I’d be lost without it.   Not sure about my new sat… Continue reading Sat Nav Jokes