Think it was julius freezer

Penguin Jokes

It was World Penguin Day earlier this week, so Penguin Jokes seems a fitting a topic as ever for this week’s puns. I’m a big fan of penguins, and you can see me feeding some of them here. As normal, these jokes come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…



How do penguins make a decision? Flipper coin.


I had a cup of coffee with a penguin yesterday. He said he would have preferred a fish.


Why don’t penguins fly? They are not tall enough to be pilots.


A penguin walks in to a bar and asks “have you seen me dad?” The barman says “I don’t know, what does he look like?”


What does a magician penguin say? “Pick a cod, any cod…”


What do you call a penguin in a shell suit? An egg.


Saw an emperor penguin wearing a toga. Think it was Julius Freezer.


What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing, it just waved.


Recently had a polar bear then a penguin turning up at my house trying to sell me things. Not sure where all these cold callers are coming from.


What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car? The Eggs-celerator.


Not sure about my new sat nav. I was in the local safari park, and it said bear left. It was clearly the Penguins.


Why did the penguin cross the road? It was the chicken’s day off.


A chap sees a penguin sitting on a seat beside him in the cinema eating popcorn. He says “what are you doing here?” The penguin says, “well, I enjoyed the book”.


Who is a penguin’s favourite relative? Aunt Arctica.



Last week’s rice jokes are here.

If you liked these penguin jokes, have a look over here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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