Basket Jokes

Had a basket of strawberries that I wanted to make funny so I decided to pun it

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Basket Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       I’ve decided to put all my eggs in one basket so I don’t look daft walking around the supermarket. Tried to put my trampoline in the laundry basket. Time… Continue reading Basket Jokes

Journalism Jokes

They found out it was proper gander

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Journalism Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Saw a journalist searching through my ice cream cones. He was looking for the scoop. A friend lost his job as a journalist at a classic rock magazine through… Continue reading Journalism Jokes

Tribute Band Jokes

then they lost their edge

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Tribute Band Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Friend of mine is in an 80s tribute band who wear yellow metal plates. Banana Armour. Tried to book tickets for an Elvis tribute night over the phone.… Continue reading Tribute Band Jokes

Resolution Jokes

My resolution is to cure my fear of New Year and get over my Auld Langxiety.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Resolution Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… and wishing that your troubles are as short lived as your New Year resolutions.       My new years resolution is to get a Velcro wall and I plan on sticking… Continue reading Resolution Jokes

Christmas Decoration Jokes

Disappointed that even my Christmas tree lights go out more than I do at Christmas.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Christmas Decoration Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       What do Santa’s elves use in the kitchen instead of a knife or fork? A u-tinsel. What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? Hornaments… I’m worried that… Continue reading Christmas Decoration Jokes

Star Jokes

Came third in a Star Naming competition. I got a constellation prize.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Star Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… What do you get if you cross Captain America with the Incredible Hulk? The Star Spangled Banner. Saw a 70s television programme about two detectives who solve crimes over the phone. Star… Continue reading Star Jokes

Microwave Jokes

Realised how long you put fish in the microwave to reheat it. Tuna half minutes.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Microwave Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… I had an unbelievably hot curry last night. It was a Korma, but I microwaved it for twenty minutes. Friend of mine was sent to prison for six months for stealing microwaves.… Continue reading Microwave Jokes