This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Still Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
Misheard my friend when they asked for lipstick and passed a glue stick. Still not talking to me.
The caterpillar missed his opportunity to play in the football match because he was still putting his boots on.
All these years of technological developments and I still haven’t seen a colour photo of a panda or a zebra.
If you have X-ray vision and close your eyes, can you still see?
Heard about some satellites that have stopped working but are still in orbit. That’s just a waste of space.
I bought some bird seed months ago, but still haven’t managed to grow any birds.
I’ve still got lots of my old toys from childhood. I’ll never Lego of them.
Started taking engraving lessons. There’s still so much to learn, we’ve only just scratched the surface.
Think I managed to fix a friend’s broken microphone. Still waiting for some feedback.
Forgot to put the lid back on my sparkling bottle last night. Checked this morning, though, and it’s still water.
The minus key on my calculator is broken, but on the plus side it still works.
Got a silver medal for Curling and a Bronze for the Bob, but still no gold in the hairdressing competition.
The Highlighter Paradox: No matter how fast it moves it will still be stationery.
Delighted to have won the local fancy dress competition dressed as a bee. I’m still buzzing.
If you like these Still jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.
And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook.
