This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Quarter Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
I went in to a bar in the US and saw a load of quarters and dimes on the bar. I thought “that makes a lot of cents”.
I bet on a horse at 10-1. It didn’t come in until quarter past three.
There are 8/4 types of people in the world. Those that get fractions, and those who do not.
For sale: Watch with quarter of a face. For a limited time only.
Went to the taxi driver reunion. Everyone turned up quarter of an hour late.
Turned up at a fancy dress party as sponge, jelly, custard and cream three quarters of an hour before anyone else arrived. I was a trifle early.
Environmental scientists have proved that a 5 minute shower uses, on average, a quarter of the amount of water that a twenty minute shower does.
I get confused by US currency. Two quarters is half a dollar but 50 Cent is worth millions.
The cow jumped over the moon when it was three quarters out. Moo.
I ordered a pizza which had a French post-impressionist painter in each quarter. It was a Four Cezannes…
If you like these quarter jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.
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