This week’s puns and one liners take the form of January Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
I never kiss anyone on 1st January. It’s the first date.
Why does Santa spend January filling in his tax return? Because he’s elf employed.
From 1st January, I’m only going to watch things that are 1080p and above. It’s my New Year’s resolution.
How many Microsoft Excel users does it take to change a lightbulb? Monday 1st January 1990.
Found a weird place where December comes before February, which comes before January, which comes before June. It’s called “The Dictionary”.
I get help keeping resolutions from my Janufairy Godmother.
I lost more than one hundred pounds at the gym in January. Forgot to cancel my membership.
Got some bargain Star Wars merchandise in the January Sales at the Darth Mall.
Saw some bales in a field at the start of January. Turns it out it was New Year’s Hay.
Not to say my bank account suffers in January but I can’t even afford to pay attention.
If you like these January jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.
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