Element Jokes

The most gullible chemical element is easily lead.
The most gullible chemical element is easily lead.

This week’s series of puns and one liners take the form of element jokes about the various members of the periodic table. As normal they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

 
 
 

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK.

 

Gold walked into a bar. The barman shouted, “Eyh you, get out of here!”

 

Some helium went into a bar. The barman shouted “Oi! I’ve told you! We don’t serve Noble gases in here! Get out!” The helium didn’t react.

 

Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman.

 

Someone told me they could make a compound of hydrogen, oxygen and tungsten. I thought, “HOW?”

 

A friend got arrested for impersonating a helium balloon. The police held him for a while and then let him go.

 

Someone threw a sodium compound at me. I think it was a salt.

 

A friend of mine quit his job at the helium factory recently. He refused to be spoken to in that tone.

 

I went to a fancy dress party dressed as Neon. Someone told me it looked terrible. I didn’t react.

 

The most gullible chemical element is easily lead.

 
Archaeologists can always tell if their finds come from before the Iron Age as they are still wrinkled.
 
 
 

If you like these element jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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