This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Calculator Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…
Got stopped by customs with a calculator, an exercise book, and a slide rule. Apparently they’re instruments of maths instruction.
Always trusted my calculator. I can count on it.
Managed to get some engineering calculations wrong by using the wrong pencil. It wasn’t 2B.
My calculator stopped working mid way through my engineering exam. I can’t count on it any more.
Told the detective that it couldn’t have been me as I was using my calculator at the time of the crime. He said, “well, that adds up”.
“It’s what’s on the inside that counts”, I said as I explained the chipset of a calculator to a friend.
The minus key on my calculator is broken, but on the plus side it still works.
Opened the post, and there’s a calculator, an abacus and a letter. Something just doesn’t add up.
Was going to buy a pocket calculator, then realised I only had a few pockets and could count them myself.
Farmer wanted to know how many were in his dairy herd, so he used a cowculator.
If you like these calculator jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.