Berry Jokes

Why can't you make a crumble with 3.14 blackberries? Because that would be a pi.

There are still some berries on the trees in my garden, keeping the squirrels and other animals fed as autumn moves towards winter, so here are some berry jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… And if you like berry based humour, there is a page of banana jokes –… Continue reading Berry Jokes

Cafe Jokes

I was in the local Karma Cafe the other night. There were no main courses on the menu. Just desserts.

I spent a lot of one day this week sitting in a cafe, so that seemed as good a topic as any for this week’s puns and one liners. Here are some cafe jokes, and as normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       I was sitting in a cafe… Continue reading Cafe Jokes

Leaf Jokes

I saw a leaf that was in the shape of a chicken. Apparently it’s from a poultree.

It’s autumn – or fall, to use the old English word – and as leaves are falling from the trees and giving us a wonderfully colourful autumnal carpet, what better topic for this week’s puns and one liners than Leaf Jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality.      … Continue reading Leaf Jokes

Polo Jokes

Really good idea to start manufacturing polos without the hole in the middle. They must be making an absolute mint.

A conversation this week included discussing water polo, so the topic for this week’s puns and one liners is Polo Jokes. Not all of the water variety, various interpretations of the word Polo. As normal they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       The key thing that stopped me being a… Continue reading Polo Jokes

Number Jokes

My pet snake is exactly 3.14 metres long. He’s a πthon.

The topic for this week’s puns and one liners is Number Jokes, with a few tenuous links. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven… Continue reading Number Jokes

Raffle Jokes

At a raffle. All got a bit complicated when they called out the winner's name. Some chap called Spartacus.

I was reminded this week of an old joke about a raffle (it’s the first one below), so what better a topic for a page of puns and one liners than raffle jokes. As normal, these come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       At a raffle. All got a bit complicated… Continue reading Raffle Jokes

Sofa Jokes

One of my best childhood memories was falling asleep on the sofa and waking up in bed thinking "wow, I can teleport".

This week’s collection of puns and one liners take the form of Sofa Jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… but if you do like your jokes corny, take a seat and have a read…       Heard about someone addicted to eating sofas. He’s got a suite tooth.… Continue reading Sofa Jokes

Post Office Jokes

Got stuck for ages behind Satan in the queue at the Post Office. For the devil takes many forms.

I recently saw a series of puns about the mail service and thought that a good topic for this week’s puns and one liners might be Post Office Jokes. As normal, their delivery comes with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       A friend wants to give up being a postman to become… Continue reading Post Office Jokes

Bread Jokes

I was confused when I was given a stroppy John Lennon impersonator in the bakery. I said "That's not a croissant, it's an angry Beetle"....

The theme for this week’s puns and one liners in Bread Jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       I’ve made a really hot breakfast, but I’m not one to blow my own crumpet.   A truck has overturned near the local bakery and spilled its load. Police… Continue reading Bread Jokes

Quiet Jokes

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because the p is silent.

Those who know me will know that “quiet” is not a word that normally springs to mind when thinking about me, so perhaps slightly out of character, here are some quiet jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality….       Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?… Continue reading Quiet Jokes